Forgiveness

I remember asking a friend of mine once about a man who hurted her a lot and I asked her if she'd have the guts to forgive him after all these years. She said she'll never forgive him no matter what because the pain he caused her is way too much and she's not stupid to forgive him for these mistakes. I admit she's one of a kind and what he did is unforgiveable. Yes, he cheated on her. And she won't forgive him because he will not bother himself to ask for her forgiveness. I remember her sentence very clearly, "He thinks he is a God" esta'3farallah! I know he won't ask for her forgiveness because he's too arrogant and too busy cheating on her. He's heartless and heartless people like him don't have a guilty conscience so why should he get down on his knees and beg her please to forgive him? It's really illogical.

Now comes the part when she said, "I'm not stupid" I have to agree. Sometimes you can't forgive someone no matter what because of how much they backstabbed you and forgiving them makes you stupid and they will always backstab you over and over again because to them it makes much logic because they will always think they can backstab you and hurt you again and again KNOWING that you'll always forgive them no matter what. It goes the same way as the old saying, "Who cheats on me once will cheat on me twice"

So? "If she forgives me once she will sure forgive me twice" ok this is true but there's something missing in the picture. If you don't forgive them they will always think they can ruin your day whenever they wanted, they know what hurts you the most.. they will say it when they see you straight to your face, they will do what will piss you off whenever they wanted BECAUSE they know your weakest point! You must not let them them defeat you. Defeat them first! You must forgive them even if they don't ask for it, just don't show them you're pissed off and they will burn inside. Trust me.. they will realize what they're going to say or what they're going to do means nothing to you at all. And what they already did, the pain they have caused means nothing to you anymore. They will know it's ALL history.

I wanted her to forgive him eventhough he didn't ask for it because he is HISTORY. Forgiving him eventhough she won't speak to him nor see his face again will release her from hatred. It will always remind her that she's better than him and it will always remind her that she had the guts to do something nobody will dare to do and can never ever do, it is to forgive.

You will only live one life. Live it to the fullest and don't let anybody get between you and this life because it's too short to be wasted on people who will not benefit you. Let them rott inside by letting them know that you forgave them even if they didn't ask for it because you are better than them. I am not telling you to be friends with them again and act as if nothing has ever happened, I mean in this case.. in this case they won't only backstab you but they will not respect you too. There's no way you're gonna allow this. But you must let them know they're HISTORY! They are DUNZO.

Now when it comes to me.. would I forgive? Of course I will. I don't like having enemies. And not forgiving someone automatically makes them an enemy to me. I'd like to think and believe in myself as a person with no enemies. I don't have enemies but I am certain not all people like me. Simply because they don't have to like me, they are not forced to like me. It's impossible to make everyone like me. They can consider me their enemy if they want to but to me the feeling won't be mutual.

Personally, I'd rather wake up everyday reminding myself that I pissed off the people who hurted me a lot without even bothering to utter a single word to them it:)

"Always forgive your enemies nothing annoys them as much"
Oscar Wilde

P.S: This post needs lots of editing. Will do after fu6our hehe;D
Yeah I'm dizzy, hungry and sick;(

But I'm HAPPY!:D

Fashion Q.

Abby mokan, bil a7raa mash'3al ye9amim ly nafnouf.. ya3ny I give them elkhamat eli 3endi wil description and they design it for me ib excellent quality and reasonable prices.

And 7eta lw I buy something from them, dara3a, nafnouf.. whatever I want. I want it to be the ONLY piece eli I have! Mabi I see it on someone else too.. wain fe mash'3al yebe3 min kil shay only 1 item w bas???

I need a list of the best masha'3el that do this!

Help me please!

P.S: Fee cham post 6afatny I will comment and reply to your comment tomorrow;* Promise.

مبارك عليكم الشهر و كل عام وانتم بخير

Rofl

Ok. So I'm still having a bad day. So?? It means more pictures and a video! Now I gotta admit, the first, third, and last picture cracked me up like crazy;D I can't stop laughing!!

The video is more hilarious, although I hate Buffy more than Twilight;p

Here we gooooooo:

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Edward Cullen VS. Buffy Summers:
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL;p

...............

You know the feeling when something bad happens and then this one single thing strucks a whole cord of bad memories it makes your heart aches like crazy then your entire day gets totally ruined and it continues to the next day and....??

That's exactly what is happening to me.

I'm still feeling bad about what she did to me, and besides my heart aches for lots of other things. So I decided that I'm going to the Blood Bank tomorrow to donate blood for the people who need it, especially for the injured ones in Al-Jahra's fire. I read in the newspaper that they need blood. I hope donating blood will make me feel better about myself even if for a little bit.

When I read about the fire today and saw the picture of their graves it made me feel much more worse. The picture is haunting me and I can't stop crying because of it.

لا حول ولا قوة إلا بالله العلي العظيم

اللهم إرحمهم بواسع رحمتك و إغسلهم بالماء والثلج و البرد كما ينقى الثوب الأبيض من الدنس

Predictable

I called her today to tell her to take her box from me. She hanged up on me when she knew who I was. Yes she did delete my number because she asked me who I am and when I told her she simply hanged up on me. I sent her a message telling her to take her box. I hesitated with sending her a message because what she did is a huge slap on the face but because she hanged up on me before saying anything about the box so I had to. I felt like sending her a second message telling her what an awful person she really is and I felt like going to her house and beating the living hell out of her and I felt like.. I FELT LIKE A FIRE IS BURNING MY SOUL.

But no I'm not gonna do this.. no I'm not gonna call her. No, I'm not gonna have a fight. I will be better than her and take the high road instead. I find it both funny and ironic how her response came too naturally to show me how much she doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. To be quite honest, I wasn't shocked by her behavior because this isn't the first time she shuts me up when I bring her the subject of this damn box.

Conclusion: I will burn this box to ashes as soon as I finish typing this post. Looking back at this I say she trusted me and I appreciate it but you know what I appreciate more? That no matter how much she trusted me I never trusted her back by telling her or giving her such important and intimate information about me. In my life I trusted a lot of wrong people but something about her really.. I don't know how to explain I just never felt the courage to tell her something private about me. I always thought that I had no reason to.

I think that sometimes it takes you years to realize who is truly your friend. I think the biggest mistake that we do is giving our hearts and souls without thinking, I know me and her have been friends for so many years but the fact is, I may have had the ultimate excuse to trust her with my life because all of these years of our friendship and the way this scenario goes, "She didn't backstab me in all those years so why would she backstab me now? If she was about to backstab she would have done it a long time ago. There's no reason to do it now. She's a true friend" she never showed me this nasty pattern of hers until she disappeared without notice. She is supposed to take this box away because it has private information but from the way she hanged up on me I can pretty much tell the girl has no shame and why would she be ashamed of what's in this box?!

I will look back at this day as a brand new day and a whole brand new lesson learned.

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On a brighter note: R! 7beebti! I got worried about you girl:( I didn't find your blog bas when I clicked on your profile I found the new one ;*

This is her NEW blog: http://r-double-s.blogspot.com/
The deleted one is: http://r-dobble-s.blogspot.com

The Box of Secrets

A friend of mine whom I'm not in touch with anymore is keeping a very secretive, intimate, and personal pictures and lots of other stuff, I don't know what those stuff are.. I put them all in a box. She told me it's okay to open the box because she trusts me but I never did because I find it disgusting. A secret is supposed to be a secret no matter what. Besides, I'd rather not find out and there's no way I would want this to happen to me if I was in her place.

The problem is she disappeared completely from my life without notice and eachtime I contact her she tells me to keep it because one day she will take it but she never does. It's been years since she disappeared and this box is causing me lots of problems because I keep thinking about it.. what if someone found it in my room and decided to open it? What if it got lost? What if it got stolen? One thing that I'm sure off is that she will be completely destroyed if the information in this box is revealed or seen by someone else.

To be quite honest I'm seriously considering destroying it. You'll tell me one day she will appear again and I can't do this to her stuff and perhaps she wants it and they're so important that they can't be destroyed. I say she's too late and I'm here begining to die a slow death because of this box.

Is there's something else you think I can do instead of destroying it?

What should I do??